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Yeah thanks boys, but nah.
Ya see, he's just gonna walk across it when he's older,
.....now where's that gold, frankincense and **** you're supposed to be giving us??
Select to expand quoteCambodge said..
Thanking you Sparky.
Merry Christmas Seabreezers!
If he's a windsurfer then I'll take up kiting.
Bad enough with a frangipani on the board but the lamb in the middle has got me worried!
...and the prophecy was thus written in stone that one day, Robby and the Disciples: Bjorn, Finian and Jason would cross the globe and perform miracles in the name of the good lord Huey...
Select to expand quoteCambodge said..
Thanking you Sparky.
Merry Christmas Seabreezers!
We've got to revive this wonderful but dying sport.. How'bout this year we have 'King of the Bay' as one of the three kings?
First you took the pagan equinox festival and distorted it into some kind of weird christian birth son of god festval, and now this, what is this, sailboards celebrating the windiest day of the year, what next?
Noah is downsizing. We will have a windsurfer instead. Where do you put those pairs of animals, you asked ? Well, God does work in the most mysterious way. Trust me...
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I bring you frankincense, and myrrh, and this amazing trade I got for a pile of old metal!
Those guys have never seen such a thing before. A surf like looking board with a sail on top? What is that the wize men say? How does it work?
the Wise Men looked on patiently waiting for a sign, anything...
the baby Jesus was lying motionless, tightly swaddled on a starboard tack in his manger, when suddenly, miraculously, his right foot appeared from nowhere...
the Gods had spoken...FFF was to be law, BFF a blaspheme punishable by death, and how the peasants rejoiced...
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WTF will we do with a cambered sail? Cannot you see the baby Jesus was born to shred the waves at the point break in front of us?
Despite his disparaging demeanour LotofWind always prayed at the Shrine of the Unknown Windsurfer which he kept in the corner of his bedroom.
"...and so he was born in a manger, for there was no room at Dutch Inn."
(Well, at least the WA people might get it)
And so, between the ages of twelve to thirty, Jesus disappeared to Hawaii and returned a peace loving freedo.
We shall put baby Jesus on that raft and cast him off. Hopefully the winds will be kind to him and he will land somewhere where gullible folks are a plenty.
Jesus has always been the mastermind of all trades. But if your name is Jack, you might be the jack of all trades. But if your name is Worsen, God help ya, but you just could be the worse of all trades.
But if you're a slumlord or a Gaylord, welp, just leave it up to the Lord for Christ sakes!!!
Well, the Wise Men have spoken. Let's take a magic ride on this sailboard thingamabob and see what happens. Jesus Christ that water is cold. Hey, Wise Man, never use the Lord's name in vein. For all you know, Jesus once walked on water. I apologise.
What's that lil hole in the middle of the board for? Oh my god, that's the vent hole dummy and there is no plug in it. We're screwed sh!tless, and this time it's for good.
NOW WHAT!!!!
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Whilst the Bible tells us they followed a star, it was actually the wind they followed.
Select to expand quoteStuthepirate said..
And the lord said "Let there be Downhaul"...
... and there was downhaul
Are you kidding??? There's no where near enough downhaul there! Shape all the way to the top and the leach is tight! Man
And it was a sunny land and the Lord bestowed upon it many messiahs and prophets and also some Combats Zones and a Diablo and everyone was happy until they realized there were NO WAVES and then all hell broke loose.....
Select to expand quoteterminal said..John 3:40 said..
He is not the Messiah, he is a WindsurferSelect to expand quotedecrepit said..Stuthepirate said..
And the lord said "Let there be Downhaul"...
... and there was downhaul
Are you kidding??? There's no where near enough downhaul there! Shape all the way to the top and the leach is tight! Man
The lack of downhaul, a tight leach and fullness in the head proves beyond reasonable doubt that this is a genine relic from the birth of christ. Carbon mast dating using the downhaul isotope is a reliable method of dating sails and proves that John3:40 is factually accurate and that these are historically accurate events and not an interpretation of ancient myths made up at least decades if not hundreds of years after the supposed event.
God was a very creative being indeed. After sweating on creating the entire universe in 7 days, you would expect to find him lying on his hammock, a beer in hand, and a joint in the other. But hell no. He found some driftwood on the beach. He hand crafted a raft remotely resembled a thong, but much larger. Then he found some bits of cut-off left over by Mrs. God. With these, he borrowed his misus's sewing machine while she was not around, and quickly stitched up a triangular thing which served no particular purpose to him at all. When his misus came home and found out he nicked her fabric, and worst of all, he used her sewing machine despite the fact that he was told not to. She was furious. With a paint brush, she wrote "Nil Pride" on his triangular thing which God still hasn't figure out what purpose it does serve.
Just like all those blokey chaps, he spent an inordinate amount of time in his shed just to suss out those notty pics on the walls, he self-taught sign writing. So he changed "Nil Pride" to "Neil Pryde". And as they said, the rest is history. A famous sail making enterprise was formed.
Select to expand quotepowersloshin said...
I heard that Judas got a kite instead, that explains a lot !
Must be Judas up the back. He's already wearing his boardies over his wetty
when you sailed with mary and joseph
there was always plenty of meat for the barbie afterwards.
