Did you fulfill your contribution properly? 
www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2021/dec/03/risky-levels-australia-is-the-drunkest-country-in-the-world-new-survey-finds
At least we close the gap in gender inequality!
www.themercury.com.au/lifestyle/health/aussie-women-drinking-more-alcohol-than-ever-university-of-nsw-booze-study-reveals/news-story/6cb3d4aae51185313ecf2d50c736f729
Not true !! 
our SB Bob could drink 100x as much and still be able to post something, to our precious SB forum.
Select to expand quotejn1 said..
We beat the Germans ? (or did they get flogged by everybody ?)
you are right! Nobody could beat Germans
What about our greatest friend ?
Do they know how to drink? or only on drugs leading the world ?
Funny Alcohol JokesWhat do a law student and a recovering alcoholic have in common?They both have to pass the bar.The son went to his dad and asked him, "Dad, what's an alcoholic?"So the dad replied, "Do you see those four trees? Well, an alcoholic would see eight."The son replied, "But Dad, I only see two."What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?Tequila Mockingbird.My dad's answer to everything is alcohol.He doesn't drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles.I don't drink alcohol for religious reasons.I drink it for other reasons.An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"The man replies, "That would be my wife."I am giving up drinking alcohol for the month of January.Sorry that was a typo: I am giving up. Drinking alcohol for the month of January.Me: My name is Matt, and I'm an alcoholic.AAA: This is AAA, not AA.Me: Yeah, I was just explaining how my car got in the lake.Where does a Canadian alcoholic go to get help?Eh Eh.I bought an alcoholic ginger beer.He wasn't happy.An alcoholic law student walks into a bar.He regretted not passing the bar.What do alcoholic horses drink?Chardonhay.Why do mosquitoes prefer to drink alcohol instead of blood?Because it gives them a nice buzzzzzzz.If alcohol can damage your short term memory.Imagine the damage alcohol can do.I was at a sports bar recently when a shelf holding alcohol collapsed.I guess the shelf couldn't hold its liquor.I went shopping in two different stores today for alcohol and, both times, I was asked to remove my sunglasses.I guess I must've looked shady.Alcoholics don't run in my family.But sometimes they fall down the stairs.I don't like alcohol, but my friend recommended something special, so he poured me a tiny glass.I figured I'd give it a shot.Cleaning with alcohol doesn't work.NOTHING gets done after that first bottle.What's an alcoholic frog's favorite game?Hopscotch.Alcohol doesn't make you fat.It makes you lean.Against tables, chairs, floors and ugly people.I say no to alcohol.It just doesn't listen.It turns out my high school chemistry teacher was right.Alcohol IS a solution.An alcoholic wakes up in prison.He asks the first police officer he sees, "Why am I here?""For drinking," replies the officer."Great," says the man, "When do we start?"Doctor: I can't find out what your problem is. It could be due to excess alcohol consumption.Me: It's okay. I can come back when you're sober.Why is Luigi an alcoholic?Because his mansion is full of boos.Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?Sir Ohsis of the Liver.What do lawyers and recovering alcoholics have in common?Successfully passing the Bar.Today I am celebrating 100 days without alcohol!Not consecutively though.Where did prohibition-era rodents get their alcohol?The Squeakeasy.I found out I was allergic to alcohol.Every time I drank I broke out in handcuffs.I tried to open a bar inside a cave but the police stopped me.They said it was illegal to sell alcohol to miners.A lemon, a potato, and a pea all had a tough week working at the grocery store so they decided to let off some steam with a bar crawl at the weekend.They had a great time, hitting bar after bar, knocking back drinks, but being so genetically different, the alcohol affected them each in different ways: the lemon got very acidic and refluxy; the potato, being a big starchy chap, took the booze in his stride; while the little pea reacted to all the sugar and started to get a touch hyperactive.At the end of the night, the three friends found themselves leaving a bar at the top of a tall hill, when all of a sudden the pea started bouncing up and down excitedly: "Lads! Lads! I've got a great idea! We're all vaguely round in shape, let's not get a cab home, let's just roll down the hill!" and before the others could protest he was off - shooting down the hill at a rate of knots.The lemon lurched after him, but soon started listing violently from side to side as he went, owing to his oval shape, which did nothing for his unsettled stomach. With a sigh, the potato trundled along slowly behind.By the time the potato had bounced his way to the bottom of the hill, the lemon was spewing lemon juice all over the pavement, but the pea was already jumping up and down again "that was great, that was great, let's do it again!".The lemon was now chundering up pips with the acid, but the pea didn't seem to care. "Come on! let's go again, that was great!".The potato turned to him and said "Easy peasy, lemon's queasy."When I drink alcohol, people call me alcoholic.But when I drink fanta, no one calls me.Or texts me. I'm so lonely, please help.Alabama changed the drinking age to 34.They wanted to keep alcohol out of the high schools.Priest: Don't drink too much liquor. You will go to Hell.Alcoholic: Will I? What about the guy who sells the liquor?Priest: He will also go to Hell.Alcoholic: Ok, what about the guy who sells pork tacos in the food truck outside the liquor store?Priest: He too will go to Hell.Alcoholic: In that case, I have no problem going to Hell.Two reasons I don't give money to homeless people:They would spend it on alcohol.I want to spend it on alcohol.How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol?Invite two of them."My wife suffers from a drinking problem.""Is she an alcoholic?""No I am, but she's the one who suffers."When I drink alcohol, everyone says I'm an alcoholic.But when I drink Fanta, no one says I'm fantastic.I read an article saying that you might be an alcoholic if you drink everyday.Thank god I only drink every night.The difference between an alcoholic and a drunk is staggering.An alcoholic walks into a candy store.The alcoholic looks around and after a while the storekeeper says, "Can I help you with anything?"The alcoholic replies, "Yeah, got any liquor?""Well, I'm not sure but there is this.""What is that?""It's liquor-ish."What do alcoholics and chemists have in common?They both view alcohol as a solution.I'm not an alcoholic, I only drink on days that start with the letter T.Tuesday, Thursday, Today and Tomorrow.Alcohol is a perfect solvent.It dissolves marriages, families and careers."You miss 100% of the shots you don't take".Is terrible advice for a recovering alcoholic.It costs over $235,000 for parents to raise a child today.And that's just for the alcohol.The best thing about alcohol hand gel in hospitals isn't the hygiene.It's that everyone walks around like they're hatching a dastardly plan.When the Hulk goes into an uncontrollable fit of rage he's "incredible".When I do it, I'm an "alcoholic".Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person's walk.The result was staggering.More Funny JokesIf these hilarious jokes about alcohol raised your spirits, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more funny jokes, including our tequila puns and jokes as well as these:
Select to expand quoteMark _australia said..Mark _australia said..
I rhink tge post sh1te
or evn
yep, agree, lets back to our usual
covid? cooking? ...
Select to expand quoteMark _australia said..
I rhink tge post sh1te
don't drink and shoot !! ??
don't shoot when drunK??
shoot all drunks!
Do only drunks shoot?
shoot to drunk
Mark is always right! Listen to him! When is sober! Not drunk! Because Mark is never drunk! Is sober even if is drunk!
makeagif.com/gif/drunk-shooting-gun-UAgZWD
Select to expand quoteMark _australia said..
^6^ pissd carnt spellf\ wrong halolhaha
Mark is on the duty 24/7
Select to expand quoteMacroscien said..
Funny Alcohol JokesWhat do a law student and a recovering alcoholic have in common?They both have to pass the bar.The son went to his dad and asked him, "Dad, what's an alcoholic?"So the dad replied, "Do you see those four trees? Well, an alcoholic would see eight."The son replied, "But Dad, I only see two."What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?Tequila Mockingbird.My dad's answer to everything is alcohol.He doesn't drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles.I don't drink alcohol for religious reasons.I drink it for other reasons.An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"The man replies, "That would be my wife."I am giving up drinking alcohol for the month of January.Sorry that was a typo: I am giving up. Drinking alcohol for the month of January.Me: My name is Matt, and I'm an alcoholic.AAA: This is AAA, not AA.Me: Yeah, I was just explaining how my car got in the lake.Where does a Canadian alcoholic go to get help?Eh Eh.I bought an alcoholic ginger beer.He wasn't happy.An alcoholic law student walks into a bar.He regretted not passing the bar.What do alcoholic horses drink?Chardonhay.Why do mosquitoes prefer to drink alcohol instead of blood?Because it gives them a nice buzzzzzzz.If alcohol can damage your short term memory.Imagine the damage alcohol can do.I was at a sports bar recently when a shelf holding alcohol collapsed.I guess the shelf couldn't hold its liquor.I went shopping in two different stores today for alcohol and, both times, I was asked to remove my sunglasses.I guess I must've looked shady.Alcoholics don't run in my family.But sometimes they fall down the stairs.I don't like alcohol, but my friend recommended something special, so he poured me a tiny glass.I figured I'd give it a shot.Cleaning with alcohol doesn't work.NOTHING gets done after that first bottle.What's an alcoholic frog's favorite game?Hopscotch.Alcohol doesn't make you fat.It makes you lean.Against tables, chairs, floors and ugly people.I say no to alcohol.It just doesn't listen.It turns out my high school chemistry teacher was right.Alcohol IS a solution.An alcoholic wakes up in prison.He asks the first police officer he sees, "Why am I here?""For drinking," replies the officer."Great," says the man, "When do we start?"Doctor: I can't find out what your problem is. It could be due to excess alcohol consumption.Me: It's okay. I can come back when you're sober.Why is Luigi an alcoholic?Because his mansion is full of boos.Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?Sir Ohsis of the Liver.What do lawyers and recovering alcoholics have in common?Successfully passing the Bar.Today I am celebrating 100 days without alcohol!Not consecutively though.Where did prohibition-era rodents get their alcohol?The Squeakeasy.I found out I was allergic to alcohol.Every time I drank I broke out in handcuffs.I tried to open a bar inside a cave but the police stopped me.They said it was illegal to sell alcohol to miners.A lemon, a potato, and a pea all had a tough week working at the grocery store so they decided to let off some steam with a bar crawl at the weekend.They had a great time, hitting bar after bar, knocking back drinks, but being so genetically different, the alcohol affected them each in different ways: the lemon got very acidic and refluxy; the potato, being a big starchy chap, took the booze in his stride; while the little pea reacted to all the sugar and started to get a touch hyperactive.At the end of the night, the three friends found themselves leaving a bar at the top of a tall hill, when all of a sudden the pea started bouncing up and down excitedly: "Lads! Lads! I've got a great idea! We're all vaguely round in shape, let's not get a cab home, let's just roll down the hill!" and before the others could protest he was off - shooting down the hill at a rate of knots.The lemon lurched after him, but soon started listing violently from side to side as he went, owing to his oval shape, which did nothing for his unsettled stomach. With a sigh, the potato trundled along slowly behind.By the time the potato had bounced his way to the bottom of the hill, the lemon was spewing lemon juice all over the pavement, but the pea was already jumping up and down again "that was great, that was great, let's do it again!".The lemon was now chundering up pips with the acid, but the pea didn't seem to care. "Come on! let's go again, that was great!".The potato turned to him and said "Easy peasy, lemon's queasy."When I drink alcohol, people call me alcoholic.But when I drink fanta, no one calls me.Or texts me. I'm so lonely, please help.Alabama changed the drinking age to 34.They wanted to keep alcohol out of the high schools.Priest: Don't drink too much liquor. You will go to Hell.Alcoholic: Will I? What about the guy who sells the liquor?Priest: He will also go to Hell.Alcoholic: Ok, what about the guy who sells pork tacos in the food truck outside the liquor store?Priest: He too will go to Hell.Alcoholic: In that case, I have no problem going to Hell.Two reasons I don't give money to homeless people:They would spend it on alcohol.I want to spend it on alcohol.How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol?Invite two of them."My wife suffers from a drinking problem.""Is she an alcoholic?""No I am, but she's the one who suffers."When I drink alcohol, everyone says I'm an alcoholic.But when I drink Fanta, no one says I'm fantastic.I read an article saying that you might be an alcoholic if you drink everyday.Thank god I only drink every night.The difference between an alcoholic and a drunk is staggering.An alcoholic walks into a candy store.The alcoholic looks around and after a while the storekeeper says, "Can I help you with anything?"The alcoholic replies, "Yeah, got any liquor?""Well, I'm not sure but there is this.""What is that?""It's liquor-ish."What do alcoholics and chemists have in common?They both view alcohol as a solution.I'm not an alcoholic, I only drink on days that start with the letter T.Tuesday, Thursday, Today and Tomorrow.Alcohol is a perfect solvent.It dissolves marriages, families and careers."You miss 100% of the shots you don't take".Is terrible advice for a recovering alcoholic.It costs over $235,000 for parents to raise a child today.And that's just for the alcohol.The best thing about alcohol hand gel in hospitals isn't the hygiene.It's that everyone walks around like they're hatching a dastardly plan.When the Hulk goes into an uncontrollable fit of rage he's "incredible".When I do it, I'm an "alcoholic".Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person's walk.The result was staggering.More Funny JokesIf these hilarious jokes about alcohol raised your spirits, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more funny jokes, including our tequila puns and jokes as well as these:
Please bring back red thumb.
In In ....
In Vaccine rankings www.abc.net.au/news/2021-10-05/covid-vaccination-rate-reaches-80-per-cent-for-16-plus/100514500
Ozz is running for the gold. Medals will be distributed later in 2076.. once it deals with naughty people escaping from concentration camps www.abc.net.au/news/2021-11-27/nt-police-find-howard-springs-quarantine-escapee-on-mitchell-st/100655796
and ones who refuse to pay for the room and board. 
Has macro reached pubertee yet. I know l cannot spell.just bored had a rather painful surgery in the last couple of days.
Select to expand quotegavnwend said..
Has macro reached pubertee yet. I know l cannot spell.just bored had a rather painful surgery in the last couple of days.
There is a message "hidden" in this picture
One may read this message
without the need for Macro comments.
I found this information/message astonishing!
Looks like nobody here could decipher/read this information hidden in this picture
and only concentrate attention on Macro punctuation and grammar.
Really?? Does nobody have any thoughts, reflections, comments at all ???
PS. Our friend Cranatalk knows that Macro performs sometimes social experiments on social medial like that your costs.For social scientists correlation between the presented picture and the lack of any response from the tested group may be significant. But real scientists just states a fact and withdraw from any negative comments.
Select to expand quoteeppo said..
Jesus macro is on a wild thought bubble bender.
I present you ( all ) with a very simple picture. The message for me is simple and clear.
but analysis by our SB forum is like that:
- something wrong here, the picture is too dark
-Why number is a smaller size than the text?
-Shouldn't it be
1.Australia not 1 Australia? where is the dot missing??
-where is NZ on the list? 
-we have the best rugby player, doest it counts for something? 
-FN could see even Macro's electric catamaran when looking at the gray part of the picture above
Select to expand quoteeppo said..
Jesus macro is on a wild thought bubble bender.
The remarkable thing is that most Aussies will feel a sense of pride at topping the list.
