Forums > Kitesurfing General

Limp dick!

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Created by Ragzilla > 9 months ago, 12 Jan 2015
Ragzilla
VIC, 240 posts
13 Jan 2015 2:36AM
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my dick has gone limp!
i tried a little blue pill, but nothing seems to happen.
my girlfriend is getting sick of it, but I'm starting to think she might not be good enough looking!

on a serious note……..my chicken dick isn't stiff anymore.
seems really soft and bends way too easy.
sometimes while on the fly, my chicken loop just rips out off my harness because of its impotence.

has this ever happened to anybody ?

how can i fix it?

advice / solutions?

rest assured, i have rubbed it and given it many a pep-talk with sweet nothings and dirty talk, but i just can't seem to get it stiff !!

Ragzilla
VIC, 240 posts
13 Jan 2015 2:43AM
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cheaper to get a new girlfriend !!

kemp90
QLD, 1694 posts
13 Jan 2015 7:39AM
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I don't understand how this happens. I don't use dicks at all, just a chicken loop and the only time it comes off the hook is when I want it to, or if my lines go slack!

yendor
NSW, 262 posts
13 Jan 2015 9:15AM
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Wrap electrical tape around it.

Stiffens it up a treat

Have done it to all my dicks.

StKKiter
SA, 85 posts
13 Jan 2015 9:31AM
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Apparently a bit of garden hose over the chicken dick works well, I have seen a few people (all flying Naish) using this.

skywalker3d
VIC, 228 posts
13 Jan 2015 10:17AM
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Soak it in thin CA (super glue) it will make the material stiffer.

P.S get a new girl friend LOL

tomasjoad
46 posts
13 Jan 2015 7:27AM
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Stick a biro down its japs-eye.... Apparently

Rails
QLD, 1371 posts
13 Jan 2015 9:29AM
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Select to expand quote
kemp90 said..
I don't understand how this happens. I don't use dicks at all, just a chicken loop and the only time it comes off the hook is when I want it to, or if my lines go slack!


I took my dick off and life is so much simpler without it getting in the way

pearl
NSW, 984 posts
13 Jan 2015 10:34AM
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Tape or hose on your dick. Also a lot 'rides' on your harness hook. Some brands of harness are more prone to the hook straightening. If it has a real fish hook 'U bend shape on its side', you won't have problems. The hooks can bend open to more of an open J shape. Warm it up in hot water and give it a hit with a hammer to close, if this has happened. Maybe compare your hook bend, and give a few other local kiters dicks a squeeze, to see how bad your problem is!

kemp90
QLD, 1694 posts
13 Jan 2015 11:31AM
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Select to expand quote
Rails said..

kemp90 said..
I don't understand how this happens. I don't use dicks at all, just a chicken loop and the only time it comes off the hook is when I want it to, or if my lines go slack!



I took my dick off and life is so much simpler without it getting in the way



for sure man. I hate when you line up, hit the flat water, ready to unhook, nek minnit the bloody dick is still in and you miss your window!

surfingboye
NSW, 2707 posts
13 Jan 2015 2:09PM
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Sounds like you need to get rid of your chicken dick and get a donkey's dick.

MannyBlanch
QLD, 138 posts
13 Jan 2015 3:16PM
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Select to expand quote
surfingboye said..
Sounds like you need to get rid of your chicken dick and get a donkey's dick.


who uses donkey dick's? :P

surfingboye
NSW, 2707 posts
13 Jan 2015 4:40PM
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MannyBlanch said..
surfingboye said..
Sounds like you need to get rid of your chicken dick and get a donkey's dick.


who uses donkey dick's? :P


kooks in boots...?

ajs18s
QLD, 60 posts
13 Jan 2015 3:48PM
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Heat shrink, works a treat.
Not to hard and not to soft, so she said.
And you can get all kind of colours.

MannyBlanch
QLD, 138 posts
13 Jan 2015 6:32PM
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Select to expand quote
surfingboye said..

MannyBlanch said..

surfingboye said..
Sounds like you need to get rid of your chicken dick and get a donkey's dick.



who uses donkey dick's? :P



kooks in boots...?


thats you hahahahaha, nah only the other day!!

waynos
TAS, 171 posts
13 Jan 2015 10:12PM
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+1 on the heat shrink. Yes I'm a Naish rider, had the problem with my dick slipping out unintentionally from early on but now I'm cured

Haydn24
QLD, 473 posts
13 Jan 2015 10:37PM
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No wonder we get called gay by those pole dancers

Kamikuza
QLD, 6493 posts
13 Jan 2015 11:31PM
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Not an Airush bar then...



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"Limp dick!" started by Ragzilla