Kitemare o' the week

Ha - put this under techinique cause it was a case of lack of the above.

So... I am havin a monster downwinder sesh on my old 9m C (which I love) in 23kts or so, nothing extraordinary, just good wind and doing some huge (for me about 8m or so) boosts and for the 1st time really riding some waves etc. A few big rib busters but all good and a huge smile on my dial.

So then on the way back out (past the break) I go to do a little semi-boost (you know just a little lift - not really goin for it) off a swell face that lifted up and the lip just catches a bit so that I get a bit inverted and sideways on the lift. "No probs" thinks I "I'll just go with it and do the ol' dead man routine and correct on the way down". Wrong!!

Too much momentum and because of the sideways trajectory, I somehow managed to flick my board (twin-tip) straight through my front lines (the board then turned to get stuck on the other side of the lines with me still stuck in the board straps) at the same time as my safety leash (connected to my 5th line) bizarrely flings around and snaps tight around my legs/bum/feet. "WTF!! This isn't gonna be pretty!! Get ready for the splash down and go from there" I was thinking (in the < 2 secs available) not fully aware how tangled I was at that stage.

SPLASHH!!! Upside down and sideways/backwards then things became clear how stuck i was the lines powered up (this is all in a matter of 3 secs or so). It is all a bit unclear what happened (well i was inverted travelling backwards/sideways at the time) but I think the 5th line/safety leash was wrapped 3-4 times around my legs/feet/board meaning i couldn't get out of my straps - still upside down and getting lifted back up by the kite doin it's own thing not fully powered but certainly the best part of it.

I had ejected the bar by this point but to no avail as the whole setup was tangled around me/board and unable to power down and I am being dragged by my feet!! Anyone who has ever tried to lift their weight from being held upside down will know how hard it is (spesh for a jelly belly such as I) to lift up - let alon do anything).

Anyway, somehow after about 2-3 lofts/drags and failed attempts to pull the 5th line to reduce power, I managed (I think) to get my legs over the front lines (so they were behind my knees) to get enough freedom to move my feet and get out of the straps after another drag or two. It pulls like fek but I get out of the board and get my legs (after one more big pull by the kite) out of the lines. Then some very frantic back paddling and rotating of legs etc to be free of the kite as the bar goes up the 5th line and the kite begins to collapse.... I am totally in shock by this stage but aware of several minor cuts from the lines and potentialy a nasty number on my calf back of my right knee etc.

All up I was EXTREMELY lucky!! I copped a real hammering but could seriously have bit the big one or de-gloved my calf etc!!

I'm not really sure if I could have done much else in the situation (after making the error in judgement to go with the invert that is) as I don't know If I could have got to the lines with my kiteknife due to the way I was being dragged. I will admit though it didn't actually occur to me which is not good. I was just thinking "Fek!! Get ya legs kn free!! Fek!! Get ya legs kn free!! Fek!! Get ya legs kn free!!".

Anyhoo - what it has taught me is to NEVER be complacent even when going a Mickey Mouse little boost and that I will be looking for a cheap 2nd hand hybrid/bow kite with 100% depower on the bar before the end of the season.. I am oh so broke but I will find a way (or it may kill me).

Oh I will also stop inverting too (which I used to do ages ago but weirdly only started doing for fun again recently).

Soooo sooooo lucky. Very lucky i had a relatively small kite for the conditions too.

well that was a fkr GFky, i can imagine the feeling of WTF!!! espec when the lines are wrapped around your legs, good point on compliancy dont go soft at all keep the focus oh yeah good plan on the full depower bar

mate you are way lucky you did not loose a slab of muscle with those tangles . it could have been the end of you kiting or anything else!!!!

Very wise but I must say this wouldn't have helped in a bizarre situation like this.

I will be practising the "go for the knife" manourvre several times for sure..

BTW Green Pat bagged me out afterwards cause I let my bar slosh around in the surf whilst waiting for some colour to return to my mush and resisting the urge to have a nice puke or similar.

For Pattos info - it was almost a 3 beer tangle to undo. Ready to go for the next sesh now (even if I am hobbling a bit).

Can you get a leave pass Thursday? How about Friday? Both? I may have a social engagement later on Thursday night but might be able to slip a kite in.

I didn't mean to make light of the gravity of the situation. I can't say I wouldn't have reacted the same, it sounded like a pretty severe walloping and you certainly were looking white as a sheet. Lack of air can be pretty distracting.

I would like to claim that I keep some sort of gear awareness about myself and always treat getting lines out of the waves as a matter of urgency when recovering from a stack, but it's just claiming. As mentioned, you had other things on your mind. I should have really got your lines for you when I saw them sloshing in fact, my bad.

Glad your ok funkster.

What's all the fuss about then?

Oh thank god your alive, maybe you should count yourselve lucky! God be with you my kite surfing brother.

Getfunky doesn't abbreviate well does it? Especially when abbreviated by someone with bondage gear in their avatar.

Cheers Fellas!



Yep the GF abbreviation (why is abbreviation such a long word??) does appear to be differant from the intended purpose so GF (getfunky) to all I say!



BTW - one of the more dangerous aspects to this incident was my life flashing before my eyes and nearly lapsing into a boredom induced coma! Yep - I can laugh about it now but was hairy at the time..

Hey Funky, you might have been scared, but certainly not panicking. I believe you were pretty cool, and that's why you got out of it with only a few cuts....give yourself some credit, won't you..?

Genuine question , GF already admits to being a kook, www.seabreeze.com.au/forums/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=44036

Jeeze GF, you keep trying to get me on downwinders with you, you have to promise not to do something like this on my shift!!!!

.... reminds me I gotta get a lineknife soon.....