Has anyone experimented with some sort of protection shorts to reduce the cross-eyed pain sensation of the classic ballslapper bumcheck landing?
Yeh , Ive always used wetsuit shorts , from my beginner era when I needed it most , still use it today under boardies , firm fit . Used to be waterski wetty shorts or cut up old spring suit .
I once slapped down so hard I thought I had done to my old fella what happens to a saveloy when you boil it for too long. Was amazed it wasn't bleeding profusely.
Now I ALWAYS wear a springy at least, just to protect the baby makers.

I'm thinking next level.
Had a wetty on, came down buttcheck from a too low slung loop, but the slap was so heavy I thought the wetty had split open and I was coughing my grapes up.
Seriously painful, was riding like a pretzel for 10 minutes.
I think a seat harness would help but there won't be any perfect solution while laws of physic apply...